Writer In Motion – The Final Draft

Given this article coming out today…

I thought it was appropriate to post the final version of my #writerinmotion short story.

This past week we got feedback from our participating professional editors:

Jeni Chappelle | Carly Hayward | Maria Tureaud | Justine Manzano

We were split randomly among them and I was super excited to have Jeni Chappelle as my editor. I actually have briefly worked with her before during #Revpit, where she gave me feedback on my submission and I bought her Query/Synopsis/First 50 page review package afterward.

I’ve really enjoyed her editing style and was interested to see how she would critique/edit my short story.

Needless to say she had some very poignant questions and suggestions – apart from some minor line and copy edits – that got me thinking about my characters more deeply.

The comment below really forced me to take another look at crafting consistency in my characterization.

I must have rewritten 5 sentences about 30 times before I felt like I got it right.

At least I think I got it write, I mean rite, I mean … right…?

I definitely got to the point at midnight after editing for 3 hrs where I was unsure what words meant anymore.

I also really appreciated how she commented on the areas she liked as well. Being compared to Terry Pratchett and Douglass Adams is my dream, so mission accomplished. 🙌


After incorporating Jeni’s edits, I had a good bit of insomnia. Then I let it sit for a day, and finally, today, just moments ago, I did my final self-editing. This consisted of throwing it into Grammarly (I highly recommend it) and going through the story with a fine-tooth comb – checking each word to make sure it was both necessary and the correct word for what I wanted to say.

Without further ado, here is my final draft of Surviving Editing…I mean Gravity…

945 words.

This story has been removed temporarily while entered into several competitions. It will be back in a few months. Thanks for your patience.

I hope you enjoyed seeing this little story go from just a blip of an idea in my mind to a fully polished story!

I really have loved being a part of #WriterInMotion, and I hope you’ve found the process both illuminating and helpful. Next week I’ll be posting a final post reflecting about the whole process, and what the future may hold.

Until then, you can check out the others writers on their websites!

KJ Harrowick | Jen Karner | JM Jinks | Melissa Bergum | Thuy Nguyen | Kristen Howe | Sean Willson | Paulette Wiles | Talynn Lynn | Ellen Mulholland | Kathryn Hewitt | Sheri MacIntyre | Jessica Lewis | Susan Burdorf | Stephanie Whitaker | Dawn Currie | Megan Van Dyke | SKaeth | Ari Augustine | Fariha Khayyam | M. Dalto | Sheryl Stein | Belinda Grant | Coffee Quills

2 thoughts on “Writer In Motion – The Final Draft

  1. Outstanding, HM!! I love what you did there at the end. Our boy Bob pulled off a full character arc in less than 1000 words! This story has been such a joy to read, and I never thought I’d say this about a bunch of roaches, but… I’m really gonna miss those guys!!

    Liked by 1 person

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